Basically I believe that I'm extraordinary and I mean lots of things about me are surely extraordinary, unique even...
And I also believe that ordinary is easy. Being ordinary doesn't require waking up every single day thinking about your future in a big picture and what's worse feeling the excruciating pain cos your present doesn't live up to what you want it to be.
Ordinary enjoys life as it's been given. Ordinary doesn't care about silly things.
Ordinary doesn't really care what other people think.
The thing is that I don't want it. I need Extraordinary too and it's hard to come by... And it's not that I'm really looking.
It's sad though when you expect something from someone and they just sit in front of you and you feel that they are not that. They are good, solid and perfect in so many ways but not that. Not extraordinary enough.
But still I don't want to lose them.
You want them to care and they don't and you're too extraordinary to do such ordinary things as asking them to or even mentioning even tiny things that you need.
And I don't ask and I can't say "no".
And I wait for texts cos I want them to care and never ask to.
Even if they are just friends.
All in all it's been a crappy week. Cold and dark and with the worst thing that anyone has ever done to me on Wednesday and long hours at work (and I work at school) and temperature and being ill and no one to really feel sorry for me :(
And one more thing: Peter Pan never comes after all. You just grow up and it's definitely irreversible...
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